Your joy is my strength

I suddenly enjoy engaging in a number of activities that make me sound like an old man. I guess it is part of growing up where one matures and changes taste. I’m starting to appreciate drinking Chinese tea, rearing fighting fish, slow songs etc. Life is like a bottle of wine. The longer the life is lived, the more mature one gets. This is the common belief. But then, without any external forces and God, the speed of maturing is slowed down. The purpose in life would then be somewhat different.

One may strife for wealth. If that is the purpose of God, so be it. More often than not, the goal of becoming wealthy isn’t the goal. It is a by-product and a means. A by-product of following God and dedicating one’s life to our Creator. A means in terms of being more able to bless others and the church financially, not for self gratification.

Lord, do not make me too rich lest I turn my back against You, arrogant and selfish. Lord, do not make me too poor lest people mock Your name. Break my heart. I want to be a blessing to people. Touch me as I transfer Your touch to others. Your joy will be my strength.

technology and His glory

People always harbor negative impressions of media. Media seems to be always in the limelight for all the bad things such as sex, violence, fantasies etc. I do not deny to have been one of them criticizing media. Little did I realize over this week that media is actually a very powerful agent. It is a double edged sword. I knew that there are Christian TV programs abroad; but all this remains as head knowledge until recently.

Media has large influence over people. I see evidences of God using this technology in accomplishing His ministry. History channel is in fact airing a few TV programs that serve to explore the truth and validity of the Bible. If the Bible is true, then God IS true. If God must be true, THEN, Jesus is God.

“Ancient Discoveries” is one of my favorite programs on History channel because of the truths uncovered (many of which are recorded in the Bible). This adds tremendous amount of faith. Not only I get reminded of God’s word the history that I have learnt through seminaries, I am able to better understand and present a stronger argument to doubters due to the visual images on TV. As you can see, I am a visual person.

Last night, there was an archaeologist who wanted to find out if Sodom and Gomorrah was not fictitious. He used the Bible as a starting point (Gen 19:1-28). The Bible states that Sodom and Gomorrah was wicked and God judged them by sending fire and destroying the entire cities. Also, he went to investigate the recording of Lot’s wife who was turned into a pillar of salt. 

Off to Jordan and the neighboring countries he went to search for the pillar of salt. After studying the history of Jordan through the Bible and with the help of well-known archaeologists, he decided that he had found the pillar of salt. The pillar is really tall (definitely taller than the height of 3 people, but I forgot the exact height already).

Next, he went to search for the lost cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. Many believed that they are now submerged. So, he traveled around Israel and Jordan to look for evidence proving their existence that they are completely destroyed, and that they were prosperous and fertile as what the Bible mentions to be the sole reason as to why Lot chose to settle down there. It was in Israel that clues became more concrete. A mosaic map of Medebaon was discovered on the floor of the Church Of St George in 1896. This map shows the exact location of Sodom and Gomorrah and proves the existence of these 2 cities as mentioned in the Bible!

 

So he went back to Jordan and another archaeologist brought him through the remains of Sodom and Gomorrah. How could a fertile land become wasted land over the thousands of years? Does this mean that the Bible isn’t fully accurate? No. The Bible is accurate in the things it states. Both archaeologists took samples of the soil there for testing. I cannot remember how they broke down the soil into dark patches of liquid (probably by crushing the soil and then adding water, after which they filtered the soil to get the organic remains). There were seeds of barley, and many more other seeds and plant remains. What does this show?

Next, another archaeologist brought him repel down a cliff in the vicinity. While repelling, the archaeologist explained to him about the significance of the coloring of the many layers of sediments. The light colored layers show the sediments forming in hot temperatures and the broken layer lines show the presence of an earthquake when the sediments were forming. It is clear that the broken layers are formed in the center of the cliff which suggests that Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed by earthquake(s).

Ride at the foot of the cliffs, the archaeologist shows him blocks of sulfur that is stuck in the layers of sediments. Referring to Gen 19:24, it is true! Sulfur can be ignited and burnt. Sulfur emits a blue flame upon catching fire. The smoke it emits is smelly and has a choking effect. 

With all evidence pointing so clearly that the Bible is indeed true to what it claims to be – the Word of God, why wouldn’t I choose to believe in Jesus? It is much tougher to reject the notion that Jesus is then the one and only way to heaven.

haunt me no more

Ever wondered how to beat the Z monster that comes haunting you only at particular times? I’m proud of my recent discovery! The secret to success is to tune in to History, Discovery, and Travel and Living channel! They keep my brain thinking and entertained at the same time. Well, books do get me thinking too. BUT, they get me wondering on the number of times I must read them before understanding the simple concept they have been trying to bring across to me for the past hour or so. This kind of thinking puts my lazy brain and eyes to sleep. Thank you very much.

fall to my knees

Devotion – by Hillsong

I’ve been running, trying to be one who sees

I’ve been working, this salvation out on my knees

There is nothing better than knowing

We are redeemed

I’m believing, trusting in creative hands,

I am praying for our world to bow to your plan

And this one thought is unmistakable

To take up my cross and follow You Lord

 

When You stand, the tall trees and mountains bow

When You speak, the fiercest of oceans is still

And I see the sinner seek devotion

The lost become chosen, and I fall to my knees

 

I’m forgiven by a Savoir who did not deserve death

He was blameless and I was lost in shamefulness

Undelivered, but it doesn’t seem right

Unless I keep my eyes focus on the Savoir who gave His life

In the middle of a world that denies it believes

It is breaking apart at the very seams

There is one thing to be alive for

And it’s to take up my cross and follow You Lord

 

When You stand, the tall trees and mountains bow

When You speak, the fiercest of oceans is still

And I see the sinner seek devotion

The lost become chosen, and I fall to my knees

 

I will take up my cross and follow Lord where You lead me

And I will take up my cross and follow wherever you go

 

When You stand, the tall trees and mountains bow

When You speak, the fiercest of oceans are still

And I see the sinner seek devotion

The lost become chosen, and I fall to my knees

 

Fall to my knees

Fall to my knees

Fall to my knees

 

This is my prayer unto You. I know that this week will be mad, but You will calm the storm. Your hands will work out creative miracles that none have seen before. Let Your plan surpass and take over mine.

I’m thankful for the moments You gave me to think and reflect. Timely they were. Zoomed down straight to the root; spot on. You never gave up on mankind. Beautiful Savior.

i am Yours and You are mine

None But Jesus – Hillsongs

In the quiet, in the stillness
I know that You are God
In the secret of Your presence
I know there I am restored
When You call I won’t refuse
Each new day again I’ll choose

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion
I know You’re Sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will
When You call I won’t delay
This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord
All of my hope, all of my strength
All my delight is in You Lord Forevermore

 

You brought me to my knees early this afternoon. When I think back of the many times I responded to Your call, I can’t help but to see Your grace upon me to do Your will. Though it may be very tough, I know that I am constantly being restored. It is because of Your presence and Your truth that I am still running this race. You revealed the meaning of taking up my cross.

Thank You for teaching me a lesson today.

I am Yours. You are mine.

crazy in love with my 3 weeks

3 weeks of heaven is ending. Trivial things I did:

1)      Met up close and best of friends

2)      Walked out of Swensen’s without paying the bill (accidentally)

3)      Learn to play Monopoly Deal. HAHA

4)      Watched plenty of movies within the first 2 weeks (Sniper, Ghosts of the Girlfriends’ Past, The Hangover, Up, Where Got Ghost, Bruno, G I Joe)

5)      Got more than a year’s mileage clocked in 3 weeks by having supper almost every night

6)      Grow my humongous night appetite which in turn grew my belly too

7)      Satisfy my cravings for Bak Kut Teh, Nasi Lemak

8)      Sentosa-ed twice   

9)      Got fried by the sun

10)  My skin: Peeling like a prawn, shedding like a snake

11)  Swam finally after a year

12)  Attend my first every Global Conference (named Leadership Conference in the past)

13)  Got my eyes opened for the Life Of Christ seminar

14)  Started another crazy thing by meeting friends for breakfast early in the morning due to lack of time

15)  Struggle to wake up in the morning. Always, when I open my eyes, its near noon

16)  Showing signs of going deaf

17)  Never touched a single textbook (thank God)

18)  Watch plenty of soccer even in the middle of the night

19)  Tasted Moroccan food after 5 months

20)  Bought new Christian books

21)  Popped by NUS

22)  Nearly died in a traffic mishap on a highway

23)  Nearly drove against traffic

24)  Drove with my headlights not on completely in the presence of 5 police cars

25)  Sleep as little as the exams period

26)  Experienced the Hari Raya Night Market with tons of walking, tutu look-alike

27)  Snookered for the first time

stop! now go!

FOP was great. The sermon was titled S.T.O.P. Worrying.

Why stop worrying? There are so many things in life that I worry about. How am I going to cope with my projects, modules, helping out my dad at work, ministry? What about my upcoming exams in a couple of days time (Aug 3,5,7)?

How can I really stop worrying? Is my focus just wrong as it is inward looking? Well, I just needed to do 4 things.

1)      S-pecify Your Worries

1. 40% of the things people worry about are not going to happen, 30% are of the past, 12% is about health, 10% are made up of trivial stuff, in which only 8% are legitimate worries. Out of the 8%, only 4% is within our control, while the other 4% is beyond our control.
2. So, come out with a list of worries and allocate them into their category. You will realize that nothing much is worth worrying.
3. Worrying wastes time!

2)      T-ake Action On Your Worries

1. Turn you worries into problems and fix them.

3)      O-ffer Up A Prayer To God

1. Shape your worries into prayers [Philippians 4:6-7]
2. By praying about the worries you have, the devil will not send you anymore worries.

4)      P-lace Your Trust In God

1. We serve a sovereign God who does not leave things to chance. Trust in God always! [Proverbs 3:5-6]
2. God doesn’t cause all things. He didn’t say that all things are good and will have a happy ending. [Romans 8:28]
3. Not every ingredient tastes good on its own. However, after blending, the flavour is great!

We can then come to a conclusion that there are only 2 things to worry about:

1)      Things we can do about

2)      Things we can’t do

Also, worry takes away our joy. Worry gets us consumed with ourselves and our world, causing us to forget about the people around us. Worrying, then shifts our focus to be inward looking, when we should be reaching out as a blessing!

I know that the exams are consuming me. I know about the amount of work I have yet to cover. Jesus, I want to do this with You. How great is our God!

How Great Is Our God – by Chris Tomlin

The splendor of the King, clothed in majesty
Let all the earth rejoice
All the earth rejoice

He wraps himself in Light, and darkness tries to hide
And trembles at His voice
Trembles at His voice

How great is our God, sing with me
How great is our God, and all will see
How great, how great is our God

Age to age He stands
And time is in His hands
Beginning and the end
Beginning and the end

The Godhead Three in One
Father Spirit Son
The Lion and the Lamb
The Lion and the Lamb

How great is our God, sing with me
How great is our God, and all will see
How great, how great is our God

Name above all names
Worthy of all praise
My heart will sing
How great is our God

Name above all names
Worthy of all praise
My heart will sing
How great is our God

How great is our God, sing with me
How great is our God, and all will see
How great, how great is our God

 

This is the first time my cheeks were wet upon singing this song at the very end of the service. This song shows the ultimate greatness of God in times of my uncertainty and worries. He remains sovereign no matter what, no matter when. Take control of this madness I prayed.

burn and drink?

Exams aren’t the best period of time. Exams = more studying = better prioritization and time management = little sleep = more caffeine

It is the time where I get most stretched. Can you imagine the amount of work to cover especially when projects are still coming in? It was simply an awful situation to be in. And I thought that this was all, but I was wrong. I still had to clear my IPPT by 31 July, if not I would be fined and RT would be calling out for me. Not a wise thing to skip or fail IPPT.

A week before the exams and I have not finished studying; let alone revise. I can vividly remember the days just before my 1^st 2 papers (Micro Economics and Sociology) which fall on the same day. There was barely time for me to finish studying as I was lagging by 5 chapters in Economics, and another 5 in Sociology. To complete studying was a real tall order and impossible task. Downed cups of coffee to stay awake, took essence of chicken daily, prayed. There is simply nothing I could do now.

I tried my real best and even managed to commit time for FOP. I really wanted to hear and experience God through that event. I also needed a break from all the studying. Ps Mark Conner was the speaker and the message he delivered was what I had needed – a break through in terms of worries. I’m so blessed by the time spent with God there and His people. I shall elaborate about this more in the next post.

Over the weekends, I did what I could to cram Econs into my brain. For the whole of Sunday, I could only cramp 3 chapters of Econs in SMU. That left me with 2 more to go before I would be more prepared for the exam. Embarked on the second last chapter at midnight for 2 hours with coffee by my side, after which I gave in to the Z-monster.

5 alarms were set to force myself to wake up at 6 to continue cramming the last chapter. However, I couldn’t take it and fell asleep after half a chapter. I knew that I had to be faithful to complete what I had set out to do, so I decided to nap for a while before continuing as my eyes were very pain. The moment where I was supposed to start my final lap came. I just couldn’t wake up. Thank God one of my friends called to borrow a calculator from me. Immediately, I jumped out of bed to just read through the last part of the last chapter and browse through my assignments and quizzes.

The time had come. I stepped into the exam hall on the dot. I was very relieved that some of the questions were repeated from the assignments and quizzes. Now that Econs paper had ended, I rushed home to touch the 5 chapters of Sociology.

Frantically, I flipped through the pages of the textbook just looking at the title and sub-titles. There was simply no time to dwell on a page. Scanned through the notes I had made earlier in the semester. All these happened within an hour. I was soon running out of house and speeding to school. My paper starts at 1415 and I left my house only at that time. Ran up to the exam hall and was very glad to be able to take the paper. I was 15mins late. Waited a while to catch my breath, but upon looking at the first MCQ, my heartbeat increased. Many of the MCQs were more of statistics than of Sociology, where one has to have photographic memory to remember the percentages and ratios of people who committed this and that. About 1/3 of the MCQs were like that. I prayed. This is one module that would help to pull my CGPA up as I was in the B+ region prior to the finals. I could pull the grade up to the maximum of an A- if I scored near full marks.

When I saw the essay questions, my face lit up. I had spotted the right parts to read through and just did my best in writing. I even managed to walk out of the exam hall way before the stipulated ending time.  

Rushed home to catch some rest and prepare my testimony. Soon, it was back to studying for the next module – Statistics. 8 chapters were to be tested, but I have only studied a couple of them. How exciting is my life? Managed to complete the syllabus with sufficient practice and took the exam. Boy, it was out to kill. I really thank God for the blessing He had showered upon me for the previous test on Statistics which I topped the cohort. It helped to pull my grade up as I knew that this exam would be a disaster. To get A-, I had to score a perfect score.

Wednesday came and it was the OG outing. I knew that I have one final exam on Friday. Music was standing in my way. Yet I decided to put more faith in God after experiencing Him carrying my through the fiercest of weeks. Continue to burn the midnight oil to clear the syllabus for music; 37 chapters. ZOMG.

Friday was finally here. Music is my only visible hope of getting an A this semester after hovering around the A- region towards the end. The others had gone up in smoke. Music was unexpectedly easy! Handed in my script way early and went down to carry out my highly anticipated post-exams plans. Finally, hell is over. The sun is shining with a rainbow appearing.

It has been a day since the results have been released. I couldn’t believe what I got.

Theory of Music: A

Sociology: A-              

Micro Economics: B+

Statistics: B+

I laughed out loud when I saw my results.

This is definitely not my work as I had to get near full marks in my exams to secure these grades. Remember the fact that I had only started to study from 1 hour to 2 days. Studying in the midst of attending cg, service, FOP, training and taking IPPT, OG outing, and ministry is no simple feat.

People believe that by burning the textbook, then drinking the ashes does wonders to academic results. People say that sleep using the textbooks as a pillow works. I say,

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;”

Proverbs 3:5

Praise God. He didn’t and will never short change me.

a game of captain’s ball

Our spiritual life is like a Captain’s Ball. We either advance or make back passes, trying to achieve the goal of getting the Captain to catch the ball. Our spiritual lives are always progressing, stagnant, or moving backwards.

In my walk with God, I’ve learnt that stagnancy and reversing isn’t the worst thing that can happen. The worst thing that could happen is when we lose possession of the ball. Once the ball is in the hands of the opposition, we lose control. We lose our morale at times; however, we may become even more determined to fight back.

Ever played Monkey? Who has the simpler job – the Monkey or the other throwers? Tackling and winning possession isn’t an easy task. Look at how many injuries athletes have suffered from tackles gone bad? They suffer all kinds of injuries from a bruised shin to a career ending broken leg or concussion.

Doing a back pass doesn’t look as dangerous now. Well, if there is a need to pass the ball back to get a better vision and sight on goal, do it! Plan the strategies appropriately. After all, what is the goal? Our spiritual lives suffer when we keep insisting on moving forward only. Many a times, we move forward so fast and lose sight of the goal till we go over the ‘Out’ line which causes us to lose possession too cheaply.

It now seems that every move (forward, stagnant or retreat) can potentially be a star move. Notice that the coach always stand out of the field not only because there is rule, but also because they can see the flow and tactics of the game from the lengthier side of the pitch. Coaches scream at players to get into positions, change tactics, get the players to up a notch etc. This guidance provided here is very similar to God. We can choose to heed His voice, or shun it to have control over our spiritual walk without God.

Who is my coach today? Am I moving back without any instructions? Is there a goal that has been set and installed by God? Move me, God. Dictate my every movement for I am short-sighted while You are supreme.

written on something red and soft

²You yourselves are our letter, written on our hearts, known and read by everybody. 3You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.                                      2 Cor 3:2-3

A long script I had prepared, with flowing sentences. Nervous I was. I was then reminded by Tim to be myself. That helped to calm me down. A life story isn’t told in perfect English. It is supposed to be personal and understandable with a little humour.

The experiences that God has given are and will be deeply embedded in my heart. These are convictions and reasons as to why I believe in Him.

 

¹⁵But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,                                                                                                                                1 Peter 3:15

Lord, I thank You for giving me a transformed life, a chance to tell people of Your amazing love and goodness, power and mercy. Thank You for using me as Your mouthpiece. Continue to let Your power reign in this nation, in Your people. Allow me to see Your sovereignty always as I keep myself focused on You. It is in Your Sanctuary where I belong. May I be an overflowing cup of blessings.